Poverty, separation, alienation, natural disaster, divorce and death are only a few of the numerous difficulties humanity faces with the passing of time. And out of these crises flow torrents of hurts which, when not properly dealt with, may impose devastating anguish upon the recipient and cause him to totally abandon many, if not all, the relationships he had developed in past years. One does not have to give up because the 'oppressive hurts', and fears, that which might befall him; he can rise above the situation and be known as a 'champion of distress!"
To be this kind of a person I believe there are four integral steps one must be take.
He must recognize that the hurting he is experiencing is real! Often the trauma associated with facing reality can be extremely devastating - so devastating, that the individual may avoid talking about the crisis or, if he should talk, he may suggest that the it is not as severe as others see it.
But time always draws a person 'home' to the reality of the crisis. More often than not, disassociation from people or places impacts an individual so dramatically that he is forced to accept that what used to be no longer is. As soon as this occurs, compliance with reality is heightened,and the person is quickly 'driven' to re-examine the facts as they actually exist.
Counsellors suggest that unwelcome feelings of fear, disgust, and revulsion, related to traumatic experiences, are often revisited by individuals when a similar experience is faced or when the anniversary date of the experience rolls around. These, they believe,affirm to the victim that, in reality, the hurt did occur and the consequences are still relevant to their present emotional standing.
Although it would be comforting to think that the trials and hurts of life should pass people by, the truth remains, these will confront everyone who is born at some point. Jeremiah, the Prophet, is correct when he states,
He must recognize that hurting does not deal on a select, prejudicial and isolated basis.
Every person in society, will be confronted with untimely heart-wrenching trauma. At this time many will cry out asking, "Why should this happen to me; what have I done to deserve this; no one else ever is faced with the troubles I am given." And, for the moment, this appears to be the acceptable thing to do.
But once sobriety grips the person. and reality begins to speak loudly and clearly, then he is able to understand that others, like him, have faced similar traumas because these are common place crises within the human race. The issue of 'why' should this have happened to me now turns to 'how' will I handle the crises.
This becomes necessary because asking 'why' leaves the problem unattended, solving nothing', but asking 'how' leads the individual to seek out growth, maturity and healing that he desperately needs during this time and for the days ahead.
He needs to surround himself with trustworthy companions with whom he can 'talk out' his crisis.
Not everyone wants to vent his sorrows 'before the world'. Pain, to many, is a private and closed matter which they prefer to 'keep in the closet' hidden from friends.
Those who prefer this often harbour anger towards God, family and/or associates, as well as heaping unto themselves further damaging concequences. Psychologists suggest that humans are gregarious by nature; hence, they conclude, everyone has a natural compulsion to have companionship, and to share with others his/her times of joy or sorrow.
An individual going through stress, needs to be reminded that it is commendable to share grief, sorrow, and hurtingwith one's fellow man.
There is strength in numbers! When one is crushed by the 'rock' of unexpected trauma, remedial help needs to be immediately found so that despair does not leave the person open to further disastrous and ruinous ends. This aid may become the 'sounding board' by which the individual can gain calm assurance that even though he may have been 'wounded', he has not been destroyed. This often re-ignites a sense of personal dignity, despite the crisis, and may be the first step towards full physical, mental, and spiritual healing!
Man needs to remember that he can always turn to God for help.
Although it is commendable for one to have friends and associates with whom he can share his hurts, it must be stated, that one's fellow man is not the final source of help.
Everyone facing a crisis need to know that in it he can always confidently approach God for strength, grace, encouragement and comfort to safely go through it. The Apostle Peter states that Christ is a trustworthy friend on whom they can 'cast all their cares, for He, indeed, has a personal interest in them'. Jesus, Himself, said to His disciples, 'Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me for I am meek and lowly in heart; and ye shall find rest for your souls."
Christ can have a personal interest in His creation because He knows the aches and the pains mankind goes through. Scripture affirms that He was "despised and rejected by humanity" even though He did nothing but good everywhere He went. At the hands of mortal man Christ was slapped, whipped, scourged, bruised and then mercilessly dragged before the courts of the land. And while the hissing sounds of the lash still echoed in His ears a crown of thorns was driven into His skull until wet crimson blood trickled aimlessly down His face and beard. When brutish man had finished his unwarranted savage attacks upon the Christ, His scarred visage resembled a freshly plowed field and now the Christ whom everyone had considered as the 'good teacher which has come down from God' was totally unrecognizable.
Of a truth it could be said, ‘now there was no beauty left in Him’ and neither friend nor foe wished to be identified with this mutilated suffering Saviour! While dying on the cross his disciples forsook him fearing the tyranny of Roman law rather than trusting in His work. Peter, one of Christ's more faithful disciples, denied Christ three times before the gathering around the fire pit.
It is clear that Christ understands and identifies with all the suffering, spite, and hurt that humanity encounters because He, Himself, endured similar agonies while on earth.
It is no wonder, then, that He says, "come unto me and learn of me; take my yoke upon you for it is easy and my burden is light!" Jesus is 'the friend that sticks closer than a brother'; He is the one that has been 'touched with all of man's infirmities'; He is the one that 'is good; He is the strong hold in the day of trouble and He knows them that trust in Him'.
Anyone being tormented by unbearable, devastating circumstances can have this confidence, 'God's grace is sufficient' to take him through all the devastating tribulations that might come his way regardless of their frequency or severity. It is God's nature to love and His love is available to everyone who come to him by faith regardless of his status in life or the way he feels. Since this love was established before the foundations of the world were laid and exists into eternity, mankind can live with the assurance that God's affection and care towards him will never change or end! It is God's desire to calm the anxious heart by reassuring man that He loves him unconditionally and that His help is nearby whenever man might feel abandoned or frightened.
This assurance should compel the sorrowing heart to run towards Christ and receive from His hand 'beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning and the spirit of peace for the spirit of heaviness.' Don't sit and squalor in your misery any longer; come to Christ today. He will carry you when no one else seems to care. This is your sure and unwavering promise from Him. If you are burdened with a concern that has deprived you from realizing your dream or that has immobilized you from success and you feel that you cannot carry on, please call the number on the bottom of this article or call a pastor of a Bible believing church. A caring soul, you can be sure, will be there for you. He may not be able to solve your problems, but he will be able to give you the support, the encouragement and the guidance you need in order to make it through the difficulty. Never give up; circumstance does not make a man - it is how he handles it that counts! |
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